3.3.15 | Stay the Night – Zedd / Hayley Williams

Stand-out Lyric/sI am a fire, you’re gasoline / Come pour yourself all over me / We’ll let this place go down in flames only one more time

First off, I’ll start with I’m in love with Hayley Williams from Paramore. Always have been, always will. I believe her voice will always sound amazing, no matter her age. I’ve been listening to her since the beginning and anything she does will make me happy. Enough of me sounding like a stalker.
When I first heard this song, my fiancĂ© and I were kinda on the rocks at the moment. We were still talking to each other every day but not technically “dating” again yet.
I remember hearing this song and feeling this way every time I got to see him. I always thought it was going to be the last time that we spent with each other and that was so scary to me but I was also thankful that I even got another time with him. I tried to keep my emotions at bay when I was with him, and tried to think in the back of my head that we were just friends at the moment, but it was so hard because of the chemistry we had with one another. When I ask him about that time in his life, he tells me that he still loved me and never stopped but we needed to be apart so that both of us could grow and be our own person without one another and it was very true. Looking back for myself, I would never want to go back to that, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t help. We are stronger and more in love then ever and I can’t imagine our love being what it is without that time apart.

Yours for the listening,

1.14.15 | Use Somebody – Kings of Leon

Standout Lyric/sI’ve been roaming around / always looking down at all I see

It’s definitely been a while since I heard this song.
For some reason though, it was the cadence at work today. I think it started with a manager singing it and then trickled its way to the servers and even some of the cooks who can barely speak English!
I guess it is a crowd favorite though. You could put this song on anywhere, and you would get so many people who knew it or people who wanted to know it.
Hearing this being sung today, definitely took me back.
It took me back to a time, the very first time, that I was s c a r e d and a l o n e in a city that I just picked up my things and moved to. I felt like the reason I came to this city was so that I could start over and gain relationships that molded me into the “real” me rather then hinder me. But during this lonely time, I started to think that it wasn’t the city letting me down, it was myself. I searched and searched to try to find who I was, but I didn’t have to search or put my hand out to anyone. I was and will always be who I am. I just needed to see that a new city or a new friends list wasn’t going to be the way to find it.
I know a lot of people who think that I left to start over, and maybe I did, in the beginning. But I think what I needed was to be away from those people to form my own opinions about the world and what’s in it on my own.

Yours for the listening,